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Hello

I'm a mother to 4 year old Rueben. I fear he maybe a bit dysgraphic or crippled by perfectionism. but results in him not really drawing and only practicing letter forms for very short time periods.
I think he'd like a pen pal, (i've asked he said yes) everyone loves getting mail right?So any takers?

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( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
asrana
May. 11th, 2013 06:24 pm (UTC)
If he was a couple of years older I'd be interested but to be honest I think at that age if it was my kid I'd just back off for a couple of months - after all it's a pretty developed skill, the kind of fine motor control you need for writing, and they develop so quickly at that age. And he is only 4. Or do you have to so it because of requirements to follow what the schools are doing, or some such?

What about different ways of doing art or forming letters? Shuffle his feet in paint and walk the shape of the letters? Use bath crayons in the bath and trace around bath toy foam letters? Lay out leaves in the shapes of letters? Would he be less anxious about it being perfect if the leaves were loose, not stuck down, just laud put and then collected back up and laid out in a different shape, etc?

I've left and come back to this a few times as I'm really hesitant to offer suggestions in case I come across as criticising you. I don't mean to and I'm sorry if I caused any offence, but since you posted I figure you might be interested in alternate suggestions. I realise none of my ideas deal with the learning-how-to-write skill, but as I said it needs a lot of fine motor control that not every 4 year old has, and one of the beauties of home schooling is being able to go at the pace of the child, so.
rosewein
May. 11th, 2013 09:06 pm (UTC)
NO, no offence taken. i'm not thinking he'll be in to writing full letters for a while and did wonder what it was we would end up sending. but my thinking was if someone was writing back in any form it might make him more interested.

Rue is meant to be starting school in september. in is then i'm going to start doing more work sheets, and proper lessons with him.

he's already picked up a lot of pre reading skills just from me answering his questions in everyday life and has convinced the childminders he can read, though i'm not sure how he's done this.

the problem (which seems a bit strong in wording) is currently twice a week he attends a childminder, they are great people who both have a fantastic relationship with my son. by law they have to be doing this stuff with him.

There own son, is very academic and eager to please in this way. I think they are a bit confused by Rue and his ways. up until they saw that puzzles would hold his attention for extended time periods i think they just plain thought he was beyond adhd (which i do think is also an issue).

recently one of them asked how i got rue to sit down to do letter forming work, i told her i thought rue might have a problem in this area and i tended to do writing in shaving foam on the side of the bath or tracing sandpaper letters. I will sit with rue at his desk and do work as he calls it too but only when we asks or at least says yes that he's like to.

So no, i know i'm just trying to think of ways to make it more interactive for him. I chose to home educate knowing the country we live in is very prescriptive on learning hoping to protect him from the pressures and so on but it would seem we can't escape them all.
little_e_
May. 11th, 2013 09:32 pm (UTC)
Hello! I have a very similar-sounding five year old, and I think he'd like a pen pal. :)

My son isn't keen on drawing, whether pictures, numbers, or letters, (his little brother likes such things better than he does,) and I think he feels a lot of anxiety about such things (and life in general, anxiety runs in the family.)

Just a word of encouragement, remember that your little guy is still very little and these things come with time. Different kids have different interests and different attention spans, and some will happily sit and draw things and some would rather run around saving the world.

Here's a (slightly old) picture of Link on a tractor, if Rueben would like to see it. :) If Rueben would like to be penpals with Link, you can message me and we can exchange addresses.
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"A homeschooling parent in Canada recently sent me a letter which ended with a quote by Roque Dalton: 'May we keep hauling up the morning.' I like the metaphor of a sailing ship upon the sea for parenthood and for homeschooling. There are no completely reliable charts, and so we must often navigate without them. We must learn for ourselves how to find the currents, avoid the reefs and storms, and enter the harbors. As we haul up the sails to go on sailing, so we haul up the morning for the adventures of each successive day. There is room for everybody on this ocean, and there is no pilot's license required or worth having. We must trust ourselves and our children. May each of us keep hauling up the morning."

-Earl Gary Stevens, Home Education Magazine, 1990